As women of color, we have been raised strong.
Strong enough to hold our own in spaces that are not only male but also white-dominated. Strong enough to love ourselves and to know how important sharing that love is.
But we aren’t always strong enough to know that our journey doesn’t have to be taken alone. Sometimes we forget that we don’t have to be alone to be strong.
Coming from backgrounds that encourage and require women to be strong, loving, independent, and successful is both rewarding and stressful.
The pressure to keep up the “I’m doing well, loving life, carefree black girl” aesthetic becomes draining and instead of reaching out for help, we reach in, only to find an overworked mind and tired heart.
You’ve been running off your own supply for too long.
Along the way, we learn that in order to be respected we must embody the strong, assertive, and confident woman at all times.
This path, though righteous, is isolating and leads to loneliness and insecurity every time.
We all need other people to help us. To boost our confidence, offer advice, and most times, to just be with us.
There is no reason your come-up stage must be spent alone. Sharing your ups, downs, and what-is-actually-happening-right-now-“can I live?” moments with someone makes the experiences more rich and meaningful.
I know it’s hard to be someone you’ve been told you can’t be, but you’ll be better for it.
Lean on others from time to time. I promise it’ll make you both stand up straighter.